


Bridges Burned

by angellteeth



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Angst, Gen, Pre-Series, Self Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, again it is 3 AM, and i am so tired, every night, every night i lay down to sleep and my brain thinks is silly little sentences, it is 3 am, its that night which he got kicked out :), literally dont know why its titled that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-07 15:50:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26910169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angellteeth/pseuds/angellteeth
Summary: When he drove off, he hadn't really had anywhere in mind. He just need to begone.He ended up at a bridge.
Comments: 7
Kudos: 30





	Bridges Burned

When he drove off, he hadn't really had anywhere in mind. He just need to be _gone._

He ended up at a bridge.

He got out without thinking about however many years ago when somebody had jumped off and died. Leaning forward on the railing, it was suddenly all he could think about.

Last year? Maybe the year before? He never could keep track very well. _Idiot._

Stanford called the person selfish for hurting their friends and family like that. If they had any, that is.

_Selfish idiot._

A bridge where people go to die was where he belonged, he felt. Call it wishful thinking, but it couldn't just be a funny coincidence that he beelined for it.

Not like his family would be too sad about it, anyway.

Not after that night.

_Stupid worthless selfish bastard._

He didn't have any friends either. Or at least, nobody he hung around actually gave a damn about him. He didn't really care for them either, anyway.

He clenched his jaw, gripping and ungripping the railing.

He could just jump.

He could jump and he wouldn't have to worry or feel bad or _fuck up_.

He looked down.

It was high up.

He never liked heights.

The sudden fear was so much better than what he was feeling before. He couldn't look up. He leaned further forward over the railing, letting the panic grip him and drown out every other thought.

Further, further, just a little further and he wouldn't be able to stop himself from falling.

He pushed back on the railing, stumbling backwards. _Coward._

_Stupid selfish good for nothing coward, can't help even when he tries. Should die. Can't even die right._

He tried to breathe normally.

Just breathe, just breathe.

It wasn't helping.

Just breathe, just count to ten, maybe higher, and hope every thought will shut up for a minute.

_Terrible son, worse brother. Stupid selfish idiot._

He got back into his car, scratching his palms till he couldn't ignore the pain.

_No wonder Pa beat him._

He kept scratching at his palms.

It wasn't good enough. _Never will be good enough._

He needed a knife.

He knew he had a pocket knife somewhere in his car.

He just had to find it.

_Idiot, always losing things._

He had it, gripping the handle. His palms were sweaty.

_Just a dumber, sweatier version of his brother._

His palms stung.

His wrist burned.

And bled.

And bled.

And bled.

And he was fine.

He felt fine.

He could breathe, he could think.

He was fine.

He'd be fine.


End file.
